1) So Cute! 2) What's wrong with me?

This penguin is super cute! I couldn't help thinking maybe he had a parasite on his butt that he was trying to shake off. Hopefully he was just a happy penguin.


Happy little penguin Celebrating The Holidays brought to you by Videobash

Uh Oh.

Wow, the girls in that commercial are really cute.

Uh, you realize, those girls are probably 17 years old.
And you're damn near 40, you disgusting old man.
You could be their father.

Sigh. You're right. So, what then? No more fantasy life?

Heh. I didn't say that.
It's just time for some perspective -
The fantasies might just have to become a little more...diabolical.

I'm afraid to ask.

Just imagine you're rich. Then it's socially acceptable.

Fine, what's one more lie? How old are we, anyway? 36?

Yup. You're the same age as Ewan MacGregor.

Ooh! And can I pretend I can sing, too?

Whatever gets us off, my friend. Sanity comes at a high price.
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