Cute Lil Critter

I don't have all that much interaction with the local wildlife - I try to take a hands-off approach. Some of you might remember the trunk frog from about a year ago.

Today there was a super cute little lizard on my car (I want to say he's a gecko, but that's probably incorrect). We were worried about driving with him on the car and tried to shoo him, but he simply hid under the hood.

We ran our errand and came back, and he rode with us the whole way. Big adventure for a little fella!

Golf Cart or Tiny Car?

One of these is a tiny car, and one of these is a golf cart. Or maybe they're both golf carts. Or maybe they're both tiny cars. Can you tell?

A Little Local Color

On an early-morning errand today, I was in a picture-taking mood.


When I ran my errand last week, this was a cute, blue mid-90's Toyota. Now it's scrap. The scorched speed limit sign is a nice touch (Sometimes I feel as if in my world, there is a prop-master prepping my sets).


It's creepy to see charred skeletons like this - makes me think of a Mad Max type world I hope we never see.


Yeah. Ocala Florida is 'The Horse Capital of the World'. All of the horse-related advertising makes a guy feel inadequate at times.


This is a horse-training track, with a nifty observation tower.

Neighbor's Phat Ride #3

Finally!

I never manage to notice when my car is about to pass a milestone mileage - I always notice a few miles later, when the wow factor is long gone.

I've had the car two years, and put all these miles on driving 80 miles a day to Gainesville and back. Wheee.

Trunk Frog!

I have no idea how he got in my trunk... He hopped away unharmed, after peeing ferociously in my direction.

Juiced

There's something almost carnal about two cars, roughly nose to nose, their hoods open and spread wide, engines naked and exposed, swapping sparks.

Drafting

On the freeway, I regularly see cars following a semi truck way too closely - I assume they're trying to take advantage of improved fuel efficiency that drafting allows.

(Drafting is where the leading goose, bicycle, vehicle takes the brunt of breaking through the air, making it easier for nearby followers.)

Of course, drafting behind a truck is dangerous - I'd rather pay more for gas than risk ending up under a truck - and we've all seen how often a moronic driver will cut in front of a semi.

So why can't we create our own drafting? Short of designing cars as if they're aircraft, is there no way to break the wall of air up into a mini-wake? Even a small improvement would add up over the course of a year - I drive about 80 miles per day, most of it freeway. (Yes, I would love to own a more efficient vehicle - say, a diesel that runs on cooking oil.)

Perhaps some aerodynamic, vertical fins on the front bumper, perhaps extending onto the hood - that way, you'd be slicing into the air, rather than shoving it aside.

How about a magnetic field that would create a virtual nose-cone for your vehicle? Just how strong would a magnetic field have to be to nudge atmosphere in an efficient way at highway speeds, without requiring magnets so heavy you're canceling out any benefit? Maybe something for Mythbusters to test out - they had a good piece on drafting a while back.

Neighbor's Phat Ride #2

A Neighbor's Phat Ride

Freeway Snaps #5

The Results Are Incontrovertible

I have developed a fool-proof method to determine whether a person believes in Fate or in Free Will.

(Yes, one or the other, not both.)

Let's imagine you're heading out to your car, and it starts raining. Pouring. Coming down in sheets. Do you run for the car, or just keep walking?

If you run in the rain - you believe in Free Will.
If you walk in the rain - you believe in Fate.
.
.

4 Letter Words

Damp is a good word for Florida. So's dank. The whole place is a freakin swamp, thank-you-very-much.

(Isn't so's. just such a vulgar word in print?)

This said, it's not surprising that I often have condensation on my car windows in the mornings. Sometimes I even take the time to dry my windows with a paper towel before driving off to work - - not that it helps.

Within 60 seconds, the condensation is back - since the temperature and humidity are just so, just so I can't see out of my windows and have to roll them down before a left or right turn, and sometimes even before changing lanes on the freeway. Now that I have power windows, this process is slightly less aggravating.

You'd think that rolling down the windows would wipe the condensation clear, but it doesn't - the glass has to have room to slide without too much friction, since friction would tax the motors. Rolling windows down will clean part of the window, but inevitably not the part you need, to use your mirrors.

The truly irritating part (whenever I see or type the word truly, I think back to English class, when we were learning business letter formats and the correct spelling of truly) is that car-makers have not created a solution to this. They could put those little metal heating strands (found only in rear windows, it seems) in all the windows - that would solve it. But no. They could find another way to heat and so clear the window, but no.

So how about this? On the outside you affix a low-profile, long and narrow rubber squeegee that sits on the door at the base of and running the length of each window. When you roll the window down, it is cleanly and gently squeegeed of water, bugs, and other debris. The outflow would be a carefully calculated angle to prevent the gunk from ending up inside the car! Yow!

The auto-squeegee is the perfect EtchCo product! All we need is a good name! Ideas?


*Also, if this product already exists, please tell me what it's called and where to buy it. Thank you.

Odd

Mister Paulius has a podcast, for those of you who didn't know.

It's a fun podcast! I was in the car yesterday, listening to the latest installment, and it was really surreal, this guy I kinda know but don't, his voice was coming out of of my car speakers, like he was on the radio or something.

Also, he's working on a Web Comic! How cool is that?

~~~~~

Update! An unnamed source inside PauliusCo has informed me that the web comic has been delayed due to issues with the Kazakhstanian art studio. We will continue to live vicariously through the creative deeds of others as long as necessary. Good thing I brought a book.

A hookup? For ME?

Did I mention that my '91 Escort finally gave out?

Have I already babbled about this? It's easy to forget who you told what. It's why I always tell the truth, because it's too much work keeping track of lies.

Well, the car was about to give out - when the mechanic broke the news that it needed its transmission rebuilt ($2500) it was a huge blow to its morale.

Cindy happened to mention my car issues while she was at work. Someone at her work who knew someone who knows someone took a few steps, Cindy cashed out a chunk of her work stock for the down payment and POOF!! I have a new car.

Not just a new-for-me-but-in-fact-quite-savagely-used, but NEW. This is the first time I've ever had a new car.

It was the most painless car-buying experience ever, no pressure, no haggling, just a damn good car at a damn good deal.

It boggles the mind. It's all thanks to Cindy! Yay!

~~~~~

By popular demand, a photo:

.

Real Life Conversation # 20

- 2 weeks ago -

I'm telling you, my car smells like dead ants.

Wha?

A whole mess of 'em crawled in there and died.

Come on. What do dead ants smell like?

Uh, it's like a sweet and acrid smell...

You're crazy. Dead ants don't smell.

- last night -

...Also take some Febreeze with you,

Huh?

And spritz yourself down before you meet them.

Why?

Cause when you get out of the car? You totally smell like dead ants.

Who knew?

I'm sure you've all seen the rainbow gay pride stickers on people's cars. As I've mentioned, advertising my sexuality, politics, or fandom on my vehicle is not for me. But hey, whatever boats your float.

Yesterday, as we were sitting at a stoplight, Wise One Cindy explained another sticker for me - it was black and blue, with a little heart in the corner. Apparently this is an S&M sticker - why ould anyone advertise that?

It's like they're asking for it. Cruising for a bruising. What is this guy, a glutton for punishment?

Oh, right.

Secretive Etcher Secrets - REVEALED!

I'm opposed to bumper stickers. Not on other people's cars - on someone else's car, a bumper sticker can be hilarious.

But not on my car. What if I put a Family Guy sticker on my car, and some Family Guy-hating-zealot comes along with a tire iron and smashes all my windows? Is my appreciation for edgy animated comedy worth getting my car vandalized?

No. Ditto for musical groups, religious symbols, political groups, and signs announcing the presence of an infant on board my vessel. What if some crazed person is madly driving around town, trolling for a baby to replace the one he accidentally left in the dishwasher too long? No thank you.

I've seen cars with all insignia removed. You look at it, and you can tell it's a Honda Civic, but no-where on the car does it say so. I approve of this practice, but 1) It seems pretentious and 2) It's too much work.