Monday, December 31, 2007


Cate Blanchett can do no wrong. She's fascinating to watch, whatever she does.

Most recently, she's sharing her talents in I'm Not There - a film about the life of Bob Dylan, and she's uncannily compelling. I don't give a damn about Bob Dylan, but watching Cate's clips in the trailer makes me want to see the film.

Good thing she doesn't (seem to) have aspirations to be a cult leader - I would be unable to resist her (let's surmise...) maniacal machinations to control the world's soybeans.

You've heard the old saying "I'd listen to so-and-so read the phone book"? I'd pay to see the three hour documentary Cate Blanchett - Flossing and Tweezing.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Nuh Uh

I did not skip a week of blogging, you are mistaken.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Little Help!

What's the urbane, professional response when you're in the midst of a tech support phone call with a customer, and they ask you what you're wearing?

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Typo of the day

The moist important thing about buying a camera you'll actually use is size - a tiny camera for your pocket that you don't mind getting beat off.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Real Life Conversation #32

Have you smelled this yuca? It smells like something...

Wait - does it smell like yuca?

Duh. Here, smell this.

:::Sniff sniff::: Maybe a mixture of bread and potatoes?

(As Nemisis in Resident Evil 3) "CARBS!"

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

When will I learn?

Cindy and I always agree on each spending X amount on Christmas. Then she spends X + $50, and I'm scrambling to catch up, each year. Here I am, the week before Christmas, in the same boat once again.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Nope Nope Nope

If I owned bongo drums, I would never put stickers on them.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

A fresh twist on a classic

You know the old saying "If a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?"

From a very young age, I've always thought this saying was BS. Of course it makes a sound! Sound waves are made up of vibrations, duh. This is simple physics.

I think a much better angle would be to say "If the swamp belches up gas, and no one is there to sniff it, does it make a smell?" since smell is a perception, and sound waves are not.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

The best show you've never seen... or maybe you have, how should I know?

If you haven't yet, you should check out Pushing Daisies on ABC.

Witty and fun.

Pushing Daisies is from the same guy who made Dead Like Me and Wonderfalls, btw... and if that doesn't convince ya, I don't want to know you.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

An unsettling trend

It seems the less I have to say, the less I have to say... must remedy this.

Friday, December 07, 2007

I've like, Totally Arrived

Used to be, if you googled MC Etcher, it would come right up with "Did you mean MC Escher?" which it still does... But now it sez "Etch A Sketch Attention Span" right after that. I guess a 1000 or so posts is all it takes to be #2 on a semi-witty typo.


Sunday, December 02, 2007

So Very Wrong

I was at a bookstore the other day, browsing through the calendars. Brothers and sisters, there were a lot of calendars. None of them jumped out to make me want to purchase them, except perhaps Extreme Ironing. There were several displays of 2008 calendars, all parallel to one another. I'd catch a glimpse of one, and head to the next display to check it out, only to discover it was dull and boring upon closer inspection.

Just beyond the calendar displays were the bargain books, on all sorts of topics from art, history, architecture, and so on. At first glance, I was horrified to see what I thought was this:
But it turned out to be a historical book, not a calendar. Can you imagine the sort of person who would want gruesome atrocities on the wall, A NEW GRISLY SCENE EACH MONTH?? Run away!