Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Let the air clear fully (open a window, whydontcha) and then start cooking. This means your lovely dinner won't be tainted by the smoking remains of last week's Chef Boyardee.
Monday, May 28, 2007
At one point, the Iron Golem was in my way, stuck in place and jittering in the "help, I'm stuck!" half-animation.
"Dammit, get out the way!" I said. "Stoopid Golem."
"Hey! Give me a break! I'm made of shoes!" my brain answered for the Golem, in an Eddie Izzard voice.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Thursday, May 24, 2007
I'm worried that after I leave, you'll fall off the treadmill and lie there, hurt.
Huff huff! Aw, I won't fall.
And if I did, the kitty would call 911 and give me CPR.
Chuckles.. I can see her jumping on your chest, boing! boing!
Cute Kitty Voice: Dammit, I'm not gonna lose you! Puff! Puff! Fight! FIGHT!
Cute Kitty Voice: ...I haven't had breakfast yet!
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Monday, May 21, 2007
Can work stress cause stigmata? Or did I simply poke myself on something? And if it is stigmata, why me? Wouldn't a true believer have a lot more fun with them? Talk about something to include in the Christmas letter.
Hey, I get paid tomorrow!
Friday, May 18, 2007
Congratulations on the rousing success of your most recent mission!
Our clients (The Committee for Easy-Listening Radio Sanity) are most pleased with the never was .of Bob 'Ducky' Jameson. Nothing shuts a guy up like having his grandfather killed as a two year old. In fact, the client was so pleased that they provided a $5000.00 bonus for each of you!
Unfortunately, Ducky Jameson's gap in the Easy-Listening genre has spawned an artist almost as bad. (no, I'm not talking about Kennys A-F, as it seems soprano saxophones cannot be banished no matter how we try).
The new target is one Rod Stewart. Search north London in the mid 1940's. Dangerous place, London... Maybe a V2 could take out mommy.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
We appear to have discovered what is almost certainly a religious offering, laboriously scrawled using a red waxen stylus on a bleached, mashed cellulose and epoxy medium.
Their supreme deity appears to have been a form of large Awqk.
This prayer-sheet appears to juxtapose the dichotomy of the precise nature of this Awqk-God, (as is typical with all early mammalo-sapiens) describing him as an Awqk, but without hair, and therefore fundamentally un-Awqk-like.
Perhaps this lack of hair was a symbol that this Awqk (named Fuzzy Wuzzy, it seems) was more enlightened than his (presumably) hairy peers. The debates regarding Evolution were clearly an important issue on this planet.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Can you spot the fake Florida town name in the list below?
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Monday, May 14, 2007
Thursday, May 10, 2007
A: No! Too crowded near the store, too many drivers vying for the spot, as you are parking and as you are driving away. Also, too crowded with pedestrians.
B: Yes! Pull all the way through via E, to make for an easy exit! The cars on either side probably belong to people who work at the store, they'll likely be there all day.
C: No! Too many jerks zipping around. Never park on the end.
D: No! Someone could park next you, and do a bad job of it.
E: No! Someone could park next you, and do a bad job of it.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Education and Experience: A high school diploma.
Must be certified ACI Field Testing Technician Level 1 and Safety Training for Nuclear Density Gauges.
POOL TEXT Wanted
Sewing Machine Operators.
CARNIVAL WORKERS NEEDED.
BE PART OF EVERY SPECIAL OCCASION
LABORER help install septic and drain fields.
seeking 6FT employees in Research and Manufacturing Positions
Monday, May 07, 2007
Friday, May 04, 2007
What? There's no reason to be shy - cookies for breakfast, that's what being an adult is all about. I'm having ice cream.
Hey, it's cool. You don't have to convince me it's all right.
Who said I was trying to convince you?
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
It started out with mouse driver error messages. I cleaned up the drive, ran virus scans, reinstalled the mouse driver. Then video card driver error messages started. I repaired them. (I'm really happy that I backed up 99.99% of my files at this point, onto our other PC.)
Then the system would not boot. It would try to boot for about 15 seconds, and then start over. Then it would start over. Then it would start over. It would not boot in Safe Mode, or any other mode for that matter.
I used the restore disc and reset the system back to its out-of-the-box configuration. YAY, it worked!
...for about 10 minutes.
Then blue screens of crapitude started, crashing the system at random -
Bad Pool Caller
Page Fault in Non Paged Area
IRQL Not Less or Equal
Clearly, I need to get it looked at by a professional, but I have to guess that if it IS a hardware problem, I might as well buy a new laptop. How long do laptops last, anyway? This is my first one, and I've had it just exactly two years.
Obviously, you can just keep replacing everything that breaks, but how long is that cost-effective?