Socially Vent? No - Social EVENT

I'm a home body - I met my wife online, back in the 90's before it was fashionable. For many years to follow, we were a delightfully hermitish couple.

We didn't socialize much until recently, and now something is going on almost every weekend, and sometimes through the week too. (Lordy!)

It's no surprise that my social skills are lacking - and add to this the fact that I am a man, and 50% more awkward by default.

It seems it's a marriage faux pas to agree to social engagements without consulting the good lady wife - who knew?

It seems the biggest issue with saying "Sure, we can attend the 'Engagement X' on 'Date Y', sounds like fun." is that as a male I do not think to ask the appropriate questions.

When I arrive home to announce our fun-filled weekend plans, I am reminded gently of all of the questions I should have asked. How could I have not asked? What was I thinking? Hmm - I was thinking it would be fun?

So, to assist myself and any other males out there who have yet to learn proper social etiquette, here is:

The Official Social Event Questionnaire
(a work in progress)

• What is the dress code?
• Who else plans to attend?
• What should we bring?
  

• When should we arrive?
• Should we help to set up/take down?
• Is there a 'before' event?
• Is there an 'after' event?
• What time does main event begin?
• How long will the event last?

• If going out to dinner, where?
• Will there be alcohol?
• Will there be snacks?
• If potluck, desired dish is?

• Will we need to remove our shoes?
• Will there be assigned seating?

• Will there be carpooling?
• Will there be children?

• Is event indoors or outdoors?
• What is the weather forecast?
• What are the planned activities?

That's the list so far. If any of you ladies (or socially gifted men) who have any additions, please let me know!

See also The Pet Peeve Restraining Order.