Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Migrant Workers

I go to the gym five days a week, and I have a certain pattern that I've adopted.

Monday, Wednesday and Friday I do upper body for 20 minutes, and then lower body for 40 minutes. Tuesday and Thursday I do intensive lower body.

The upper body days are more stressful, because I use many more machines, and that means more interaction with people. Interaction is fine, when I'm fully clothed, not sheathed in sweat, and panting. Hard to carry on a worthwhile conversation when you might be dripping on your conversation partner.

Now, when I use a machine, I do a number of reps of ten, usually between five and ten reps, depending on how sore I am and how blue the sky is that day.

(I have a little sky meter thing, very handy)

Between reps, I stay on the machine, stretching and flexing my burning, newly torn muscles. I "rest" for perhaps 20 seconds. Then I do another rep, and repeat. Makes sense, right?

But not everyone thinks so, oh no.

I call these people Migrant Workers, and they can't stand to sit still for more than 20 seconds. They'll do one rep on a machine, and then jump up and run to a nearby machine, do one rep, run to another machine, do one rep, jump rope for ten seconds, and end up back at the machine where they started.

Not only does this create a lot more floor traffic than need be, but these people rarely wipe their sweat off the machines during this process. Because, you know, they're not done yet. And since everyone has different height and lifting weight needs, while they're away from a machine, it's likely that someone else has reset the machine for their own use. Is this not frustrating to the Migrant Workers? Clearly not enough to change their behavior.

I can't imagine that this is a good way to work out in a public gym. If you have your own gym at home, and five different machines, hell - go to it.

But when I'm trying to work out, stay out of my way! Also, I have a pet peeve about people lingering behind me, where I can't see them - and all this extra traffic irritates that peeve.

Perhaps Migrant Workout Style is described in popular workout manuals. I can see the benefit of keeping your heart rate up, and exercising one muscle group while the other takes a 20 second break. Instead of waiting to do the next rep, you're doing a different rep. I can see the logic, but it really doesn't work in a public gym. So if you're a Migrant Worker who attends a public gym, and you're reading this, please stop your annoying workout behavior. Thanks.

Maybe you could attend at 4am or something, you know - when other people aren't around. Then you could hop around all you like, sweating on everything, marking your territory, it'll be great!

Also, to the woman who came up to me the other morning as I was on the Lateral Collateral Ultralift Machine who asked me "How many reps do you have left?" - This is not a polite question, no matter how politely you ask it.

Because really, you're saying "How long until you get out of my way?" and that aint nice. Just use a nearby machine and keep your BPM up until I'm done. And if you don't get to use the Lateral Collateral Ultralift Machine today, sorry about that.

I very rarely get to use the Ab-Killer 5000, but you don't see me harassing people.

3 comments:

  1. someone talked to you while you were on a machine? oh no, no thank you, if i'm gonna get sweaty and hurt myself on a piece of machinery in front of others, i should not have to make nice-nice chit-chat at the same time.

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  2. I know! People talking to me, being all polite. I don't know what the world is coming to.

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  3. LOL-I know what you mean-
    And the worst part is that the "migrant workers" are there just for the show- they don't actually get anything out of working out like that.
    I refuse to go to Golds gym- it's not a real gym- it's just the IT spot to be for all the Barbies and Kens-the IT girls and guys in the area- not real people.

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