Friday, September 16, 2005

Expect the Un-Inspected

Today's shout-out is for the reader-homies in Miami, Florida! I have family in Hollywood, Florida, right next door.

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I've invented a new job! It's an 'Expectation Consultant'.

It's a business-to-business service for companies that deal with customers, clients and vendors in person. The Expectation Consultant comes by to view your sales floor or office and creates a report.

We all have expectations when visiting a place of business. What's important is to address the needs of the customers and patrons, and speak to their wants and preconceptions.

A legal firm should be prim but modern, organized but creative. Everything should reinforce credibility and competence.

A television studio's office should be high tech and slick. Flat screen monitors, dynamic color, an artistic collage of their popular characters.

The office of the auto mechanic should be clean and modern, many informative charts listing services and up-to-date prices, perhaps displaying a series of model cars with cutaway views of engines, transmissions, and other components - for decoration and also demonstration purposes.

Hundreds of elements would be considered, from dress code, to color scheme, furniture, software and technology.

If it's 2005, you should not walk by a PC and see 'Windows 98' booting up. If a business is so behind on their operating system, how up to date are they with virus protection and data backup? Security? Yes, one of your applications might require Win98, but if so, make sure the customer does not see it.

Sometimes you need someone else to come through and tell you - hey, these stacks of boxes by the front door look really sloppy, Yes I'd like a bottled water, but not from your fungus-ridden fridge, good grief - these conference room chairs are falling apart, and for god's sake Windex the thousands of fingerprints from the projection screen before you give a PowerPoint presentation to a perspective client who's considering giving you thousands or millions of dollars.

An office can slowly deteriorate over a period of years, and the people working there might not have the perspective to recognize the issues. In the end, it's all common-sense information, but many people seem more than willing to pay for common sense. An Expectation Consultant is not exactly a new thing, but a different twist on Interior Designer.

5 comments:

  1. I like the idea, but the job title needs a better name.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I WANT that JOB!!!

    Can you start a Consulting Agency and hire me?

    I am really GOOD at telling people what is wrong at places and how to fix them.
    ;-)
    Seriously.

    Please?
    Huh?
    Huh?

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL! I want this job too. I'll keep your resume on file...

    :o)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sorry to be a little off topic, but you mentioning win98 reminded me of something.

    It was Christmas, 1995. I was in a local PC store when I overheard the following.

    Sales assistant : We offer a variety of Operating systems, would you like Windows 95?

    Elderly lady : I don't think so.

    SA : Why?

    EL : What's the point in buying windows 95 when there's only a couple of months left? I'll wait for windows 96.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Agreed! Although better for small, private businesses I would think.

    ReplyDelete