Have you ever been obligated to prepare a Dinner? (Note the capital D).
Even if you have weeks to prepare, there's still a lot of stress involved - and you can have the best ingredients, apply only the finest time-tested recipes, use the best equipment, and still fail!
Maybe the humidity was too high, you had a hang nail, there was ill-fated barometric pressure, or a bad hair day. Thousands of tiny factors can add up to a momentous-compulsory-muy-importante Dinner that ends up ruined.
Once again, it's EtchCo to the rescue! Introducing Instant Ruined Dinner!
That's right, for just $9.99, you get the whole Instant Ruined Dinner package, precision-molded from the finest non-toxic recycled newspaper pulp! Only the finest quality full-color pigments!
You'll get what appears to be 4 burned beef, chicken or fish entrees, 4 acrid and soggy rice or potato sides, 4 grayish and limp vegetable portions, and a large burnt apricot blintz. (Full Thanksgiving Package available for just $29.99 - order now)!
Just add water to and microwave the enclosed AirFlava packet for that classic, genuine burnt dinner smell! Instant Ruined Dinner has super easy clean up!
Are you desperately tired of your current stove? Instant Ruined Dinner is a great way to convince your spouse it's time for an upgrade!
Included with your Instant Ruined Dinner order you'll receive a gift coupon for all 4 national pizza merchants. Dinner is saved! Remember, nothing says "Way To Go On That Big Promotion!" like a supreme thin crust with extra cheese.
Coming soon from EtchCo - Instant Ruined Anniversary Sex
Even if you have weeks to prepare, there's still a lot of stress involved - and you can have the best ingredients, apply only the finest time-tested recipes, use the best equipment, and still fail!
Maybe the humidity was too high, you had a hang nail, there was ill-fated barometric pressure, or a bad hair day. Thousands of tiny factors can add up to a momentous-compulsory-muy-importante Dinner that ends up ruined.
Once again, it's EtchCo to the rescue! Introducing Instant Ruined Dinner!
That's right, for just $9.99, you get the whole Instant Ruined Dinner package, precision-molded from the finest non-toxic recycled newspaper pulp! Only the finest quality full-color pigments!
You'll get what appears to be 4 burned beef, chicken or fish entrees, 4 acrid and soggy rice or potato sides, 4 grayish and limp vegetable portions, and a large burnt apricot blintz. (Full Thanksgiving Package available for just $29.99 - order now)!
Just add water to and microwave the enclosed AirFlava packet for that classic, genuine burnt dinner smell! Instant Ruined Dinner has super easy clean up!
Are you desperately tired of your current stove? Instant Ruined Dinner is a great way to convince your spouse it's time for an upgrade!
Included with your Instant Ruined Dinner order you'll receive a gift coupon for all 4 national pizza merchants. Dinner is saved! Remember, nothing says "Way To Go On That Big Promotion!" like a supreme thin crust with extra cheese.
Coming soon from EtchCo - Instant Ruined Anniversary Sex
Ok, this absolutely killed me. While it might be the height of self-defeating laziness (making work to avoid work), I have a feeling that this might be one of EtchCo's biggest sellers.
ReplyDeleteWhile I'm curious I have to ask myself, "Do I want to know what comes in the ruined anniversary sex package?" Nah, probably not.
Aw man, I've been such a chump. I've been wasting my time actually ruining dinner when I could have just spent $9.99 and had EtchCo do it for me!
ReplyDeleteThanks EtchCo, you saved my marriage!