Friday, July 22, 2005

Ben and Jerry for Sainthood!

Ben & Jerry's now offer these cute little singles, the iced cream equivalent of a tequila shot. They even come with their own little spoon!

Cherry Garcia, my favorite flavor, clocks in at 220 calories - a very respectable portion of iced cream. Not a sufficient portion, to be sure - since I can happily devour half a pint in one sitting with sticky-faced enthusiasm.

I'm glad to see these smaller portion sizes, because I've been ranting to
Cindy for a while now that it's not so much that everything tasty is bad for you, it's that the portions are totally out of control.

Smaller portions should be more readily available. Interestingly, you can find a mini bag of Oreo's at the drug store, but not at the grocery store. The normal sized
bags of Oreo's contain 51 cookies.

Who is going to slowly portion their huge pack of Oreo's? The package does not lend itself well to being resealed, so it seems Nabisco expects us to devour the entire package within 1 to 2 days. So I like the small sized Ben & Jerry's, and hope to see more of the same.

I also have an idea about portion control, because sometimes I'm in a very snacky mood and have little self control. Usually I'm fine, but on some days I'm weak, and the cookies they come a'callin.

Idea:
The PortionSafe(TM).

The PortionSafe(TM) would essentially be a series of sturdy drawers linked to a time lock. Each drawer would be sized to hold a small quantity of cookies, chips, pork rinds, whatever your weakness is.

You come home from the grocery store, and portion out your evil snack cakes into the various drawers. One drawer = one recommended serving size.

Then you close the drawers.

The time lock feature will only allow you to open one drawer of your choice a day. This does not mean that on Friday you can open five drawers. One drawer every 24 hours.

There could also be a PortionSafe(TM) version for the fridge, a version for Beer and Wine, and a version for the freezer. And the accessories! Downloadable DrawerTones!! Don't get me started.

And if you really just gotta get in to one of those drawers RIGHT NOW, you can call the PortionSafe(TM) Hotline (only $2.99 a minute!) and we can unlock a drawer electronically, ala OnStar.

It would be so funny when your kid locks your car keys into a PortionSafe(TM) drawer just before you have to leave for work.

4 comments:

  1. OMG- I LOVE that idea! Hurry up and get it on the market!!

    BTW- Part of Hunters Revenge has been posted on my site now so y'all can review it over the weekend. I will be resting my wrist the rest of the weekend. Stitches out-but bruised as a banana that has been batted around with a Louisville Slugger!!

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  2. Genius, definitely.

    I had an idea some time ago that I thought would fill a similar need: on nutrition labels, rather than including simple numbers I think they should include images. Saturated fat, for example, would include an image of lard, portioned to reflect accurately exactly how much crap you're putting into your body by eating a given product. Such visualizations would, I think, mean a lot more to a lot of people than the numbers that products currently sport.

    Also, what's up with the metric system? :p

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  3. Sounds similar to the 'cigarette safe' for people who want to give up smoking.

    It's a metal cigarette case on a time lock that allows you to only remove one cigarette at a time, and makes you wait longer each time you take one.

    Only problem is that it didn't work. When someone has a real sugar/nicotine/caffeine craving, rather than wait, they just went to the store.

    Hmmm, couple your portion safe(tm) with a 'Wallet safe (tm) and you just might have something!

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  4. give it another 3-5 years and i'll be saying i knew you when--

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